I realize that one romanticizes one's own suffering. Romanticizes the loneliness experienced. Creating a state of evasion and conformity. That becomes an addiction to the pit of sadness and the past that is recreated in vain memories. Emotional life thus becomes a comfort zone or a refuge from which one does not want to escape. Choosing to suffer or choosing loneliness instead of changing things to live the life one would like to live.
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